Why Top 3, 7 or 10 Lists Do Not Work
星期二, 06月 3rd, 2008We are a quick fix species. Top 3, 7, 10 ways to achieve whatever. We have long history of buying what the medicine man sells: hope really, but who ends up richer or better off?. PT Barnum understood to entertain first, then clean out the fool’s pockets in appreciation. Even today whether TV, internet or cell phones, the steady stream of pitches are designed to market niche interests with the goal to collect our money for their success.
The only Top 10 List of value is David Letterman’s…asking nothing more of us than to be entertained. Quick, making fun of himself, important celebrities, bumbling politicians and goofy corporations, his Top 10 Lists follow a formula designed to make us laugh at others and sometimes even ourselves.
There is no such thing as a quick fix or Top 3, 7, 10 steps to self improvement success. Popular topics are weight loss (anything other than a commitment to eat less, exercise more truly work?), medicine (other than aspirin and chocolate, what is there?), dating (oh please, maybe Tom Cruise can say “you complete me,” but base dating on his track record?), wrinkles (you earned em, savor your experiences!), get rich quick (got a guess on who’s really getting rich quick?) and on and on.
Cynical?, possibly. Realistic?, surely. Hope is best left to those who enjoy disappointment. So, how do you succeed, accomplish your goals, improve your health? With apologies to David Letterman: Top 10 Self Help Steps
1. Buy self help books, tapes or CDs as nice delusion to what you unwilling to accomplish.
2. Decide what you want, then do nothing to make a difference. Be a victim!
3. Look down at and discourage others. Misery loves company!
4. Soduko will set you free!
5. The secret isn’t the law of attraction, the secret really is the comfort of distractions.
6. Keep your head down and tolerate your daily drudgery, let someone else seize the day.
7. Live vicariously through reality shows as a great way to avoid making your potential.
8. Buy your products based on whether they are a NASCAR sponsor.
9. Only a baby with a wet diaper likes change. No one but you appreciates the rut you are in.
10.Retirement plan based on lotto plays.
Well, so much for Top 10 lists. You embracing 3, 7 or 10 of the above? Guess these best left to Mr. Letterman after all, as who truly getting the last laugh?
Harry Gorden is a writer, lives in Chicago and welcomes inquiries at: hmgorden@comcast.net.
Tony Stewart stood with a hand on his hip, looking grim faced as his crew worked on the No. 20. Kevin Harvick folded his arms and could only watch the rest of the field speed around the track.